The corrupted wish game

[XI]

In this game, the rules are easy enough and kinda self explanatory. Just make a wish and the next poster will grant it. However, when the wish is granted it will be majorly flawed.

e.g.

Post 1:
I wish I had a ham sandwich

Post 2:
Granted, but the ham had past its sell-by date by 2 weeks. You eat it and now suffer from food poisoning.

I wish I could marry a Page 3 model

Post 3
Granted, but 2 days after the marriage you find out she's a transvestite.

Okay, I'll start things off.

I wish I could understand wiremod better.

[Christoffer395]

Granted, but you will forget all about your real life

I wished i had a whopper cheese in my hand

[thingshappen]

Granted, but it turned out stale, and old... you fell very ill

I wish I had a battery

[sleepy]

but the battery is empty...

I wish i had a job

[Dotmister]

The job was to clean up puke.

I wish I had some money.

[PX1K]

you got all the money in the world but the world exploded.

I wish I could hug a crux

[Alfie]

The wish was granted but the person who granted it was slightly deaf and gave you cock.

I wish...
I could fly.

[PX1K]

You can now fly! Heres your passport and tickets.

I wish to get the worlds best ever computer that isnt available to public

[thingshappen]

Granted, but it was so good it formed a black hole when you started it, and sucked itself in.

I wish I had a chocolate fountain... a big one... pl0x.

[XI]

...I'm almost tempted to give you a picture of tubgirl here but something like this is so crass and uncalled for might get me banned...

Instead, you just get a cheap fountain with a bar of chocolate in.

I wish spies stopped sappin' mah sentry.

[Alfie]

This is granted but you have to keep all the spies in your house.

I wish there was no school.

[XI]

Done, but there is a worldwide epidemic of stupid because no-one knows how to do anything. You suffer from a heart attack, the ambulance driver is too stupid to know how to drive and the paramedic tries restarting your heart by kicking you in the head.

You are now dead.... sorry...

I wish this topic would end.

[thingshappen]

Granted, however you have to post in it forever first.

I wish I could sap a sentry...

[PX1K]

Granted but the spy will be coming for you... you stole his sapper.

I wish I could have a helicopter and know how to fly it

[XI]

Done, but it came straight from the 'recondition line'... Your helicopter crashes and explodes in the middle of a desert leaving you with no hope for survival and a slow and painful death.

I wish my next wish is not corrupted.